Fast Track Recruitment

I had a dream

Posted by Mitch on 28th October 2015

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It was last night actually.

And it was bizarre and horrible – like those dreams we’ve all had at least once where we find ourselves naked in a crowded street.

In this dream I’d been forced to teach a room full of agency recruiters how to get better at doing business on contingency.

One of the recruiters asked; “What do I say when a potential client asks why they should work with me?”

Me; “Err, I don’t know. Let me get back to you on that one.”

Then another question from a different person; “How do I get better responses to my ads if all I’ve got to work with is a job spec and the client’s website?”

Me; “Yeah, that’s a tough one.”

Then another; “How do I get my jobs to placement ratio from 1 in 5 to 1 in 2?”

Me; “Blimey, you got me stumped there too.”

Then I looked round to the MD of the agency, who I think was pointing a gun at me, and just shrugged my shoulders and outstretched my arms in an unstated plea of “What do you want me to do to these people, lie?”“I could do some dick jokes if you think that might help pass the next 3 hours?”

I woke-up before he shot me.

It was Kafkaesque in the sheer sense of bewildered horror it invoked.

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Previously…

Ghosting on steroids. »

Recruitment Consultant - Staffordshire - £30-40K + commission + company performance bonus »

Take a running jump… »

Are you getting any? »

We all love a metaphor, right? »

Stick it in the blender. »

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The Marionette Madness March »

The problem with KPIs »

Recruiter. Jobs. London. »

Recruiting Monogamy »

You’re cheap for a reason. »

Talentspotting »

Me, Me, Me… »

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